Baby Steps

December 20th we transferred two viable, healthy embryo's. It was our 7th IVF attempt to have another child. It's brought bumps in the road that we didn't expect, countless tears, too many injections to count, multiple bruising, swelling, nausea and the list goes on. We've prayed. On our knees, in our cars, in the shower, before bed. We begged and pleaded. Our faith has been tested since this process first began. We crumbled. More than once. But we always got back up. We did bed rest and we waited the long 2 weeks that IVF couples have to wait before learning their fate. We counted days, hours, minutes, seconds.

We won.

On January 2nd we got our positive.

Before the celebration begins, we have a ways to go. You see, we've been here before. We are thrilled to overcome the first major hurdle, but we still have some work to do. Like Dr. Binor said, we are cautiously optimistic. HCG, estrogen and progesterone numbers look good. Everything is where it needs to be.

We have so many people who follow our story that it was hard to keep this one to ourselves. So, even though we want to scream from the rooftops...it's not time...not yet. This pregnancy has already brought some minor complications. Last week I was in the hospital with pancreatitis and ulcers due to the meds I'm on. Yesterday, I was in panic mode due to moderate bleeding. Fortunately the bleeding is coming from outside of the cervix- which means it's most likely due to the medication as well.

IVF does a number to your body. My body has a mind of it's own and in less than a week, I've been once again reminded that this won't be a cakewalk. There's part of me that feels a little frustration that I can't just take our positive for granted and enjoy the ride. Everything has been a battle for us. We will take this on together as a family and deal with anything and everything that comes our way.

Until we get the green light, we will not be telling Olivia. God forbid things don't go our way, I wouldn't want to hurt her heart.

So, as of today we are 5 weeks and 3 days pregnant. We are thankful and blessed, but we're holding our breath.

When we were pregnant with Olivia, Dr. Alexander would set short term goals for us. Every time she would set a goal I would well up and think it was impossible for us to reach the goal. She always smiled and would say, "baby steps".

So, that's what we are doing. Trying to slowly get through each day, setting short term goals. The green light feels like forever away, but I know we'll get there.

Baby steps.