"Your tubes are blocked."

**This took place back in 2010-2011. This is our story about getting pregnant with our Olivia...


"Your tubes are blocked." 

"Come again?"

"Your tubes. They are blocked."

Laying in the middle of the cold ultrasound room with complete and utter confusion I knew, this was going to be the start of a long journey for us.

Since beginning this blog I have received nothing but supportive emails from people all over the country. Everyone's question is always, "how did you know you needed IVF?" "What started this all?"

My husband and I were trying to have a baby with no success. Month after month we would get a negative pregnancy test which took away all of the "fun" from trying for a baby. Everyone around us either had kids or were pregnant and we just felt like total failures.

At the time I worked with a friend who was way too familiar with infertility. She suggested that I go see my OB and start getting tested. It had only been 10 months of trying and I knew Dr. A wouldn't see anyone until they had been trying for at least a year. Do I wait for two more months? Or, do I follow my intuition and lie about how long we had been trying for and make the appointment? So, I did what any person with zero patience would do, I lied.

I went through two months of blood work and ultrasounds and passed every test thrown my way. Don did his part and received an "A" for effort ;)

The last test she wanted to do was a Hysterosalingogram (HSG). It's an xray of your uterus and fallopian tubes. The doctor inserted a thin tube in my uterus and pumped dye through to see the flow of the tubes. If all goes well you're suppose to see the dye run through the tubes- it looks like little squiggly lines. I laid there and she kept pumping, pumping, pumping. I saw the dye, but it ultimately ran right back out. My tubes wouldn't open, not even a smidge.

When she said they were blocked I completely panicked. What? Why? How? I had never had surgery, no scar tissue- it didn't make sense. There was/is no rhyme or reason as to why these tubes are blocked.

Dr. A didn't really seem fazed. She told me the next step was surgery to open up the tubes.

Oh shit. Like, real surgery? The kind where you're put under? I've never broken a bone let alone had surgery.

She was fairly confident that this would be my fix and that I would be on my way to make some cute, healthy babies. I agreed to the surgery and a few weeks later I went under the knife for my "easy" fix. 

Once I woke up from anesthesia I asked for two things. 

  1. A milkshake

  2. Are my tubes open?

She had good news and bad news. Good news, my left tube was partially open, enough where she thought an egg could get through. Bad news, the right tube wasn't budging. She made another incision and tried for a different angle with no success. 

I hate when there is good news followed by bad. It's never good enough for me. The partially opened left tube gave me zero comfort. Dr. A wanted us to try naturally a couple more months before we look into other options. I didn't agree with her thinking, but I did as she recommended. 

The next two months were a complete failure. I got my period, but never ovulated. We didn't even have a chance. With that, she recommended that we begin to see a specialist. The best was Dr. B, but she said he was hard to get into so she told me to go to some fertility clinic as they could get me in sooner. 

Not happy and totally discouraged I spoke with my girlfriend who faced fertility issues of her own. 

"Oh no. No, no, no. Call Dr. B. He is the best. I wouldn't go to anyone else. Call him. If you want a baby, he is your man."

Done deal. I wanted the best so I called to make an appointment for a consultation. When the receptionist told me that his first available was in two months, I about fell off my chair!

"Lady! I don't think you heard me. My husband and I have been trying for over a year now and I need to get in right away!"

My complaining mixed with hopeless frustration didn't help any. The waiting game continued.

The day we met Dr. B I could have bet my life that I was on candid camera. This man walks in with biggest smile, thickest accent and full of jokes. I remember wondering what he was smiling about. I was sitting there feeling empty and pissed off and was in no mood to laugh at his jokes. He told me he would need a couple cycles of his own tests to determine which route to we would be taking. He wasn't impressed with a partially opened tube, especially not knowing why the tubes were closed in the first place. His fear was that the tube would close back up at any time.

Two months of additional tests was incredibly draining. Every test he took didn't come back in my favor. My estrogen levels are too low. My body doesn't produce progesterone. I only ovulate on the right side (right tube is closed). My cycle is all over the place which is probably why there are months I go without ovulation. Every phone call I received brought tears to my eyes. There were days I would leave the doctor and scream in the parking lot. I would sit at my desk with my head down and bawl. It wasn't going to be an easy road for us and I wasn't sure how prepared I would be to face the unknown.

After two full cycles of testing, Dr. Binor recommended that we move forward with IVF.